Yesterday I rode my motorbike from Oslo to my mothers hometown. It was raining and the wind was playing around in the trees... and of course also on me who was riding like the wind! I was pretty wet and cold when I got to my mothers house. Sort of cleansed by wind and water... but more was needed to get me back on track...
I don't have a garden of my own in Oslo, but when I get to work in the garden as I do when I'm here at my mum's house, I seem to find balance in myself again. As my previous post told of, I'm thinking a lot about love these days. The feeling of not being heard, and not being loved as I love... And when I work with plants of the earth, clearning up weed, and leaves from last autumn, I get connected to myself and find myself being a bit childish in my thoughts about love. Do I have the right to expect him give back to me exactly what I give to him? Do I really want it to be so? Maybe I forget that he is his own person, with his own mind and his own ideas. Well... what do you expect from a person who have been single for 34 years... :-) And I don't really want to be in a relationship with someone exactly like me...!! B u t I realize that it takes more than a few months in a relationship to get used to another persons free mind...! I'm so lucky to be able to experience these feelings and thoughts! And Bless Mother nature for giving me insight to my own childishness and narrowsightedness... so that I may get back on the right track again, in giving all the love I have, and expect nothing back. That is how Our Mother shares her love with us. She gives freely, expecting nothing back. Allthough... living like this... we also seem to distroy her. But that is a theme for a new post another day...!
Life and Love is a wonder
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